The Dawn Patrol's Book
by alphayamergo
Summary: When the dawn patrol brings back a book called "A Sweet Hero", and the Clan finds they can read, they find that stories about them can be worse than what it already was... And not just with the villans, either.


**A/n: I was really shocked at the lack of mary-sue bashing in the warriors section. So, I decided to check around the OC stories (oh the horror) to see how many were mary sues/gary stus. I took, what, five samples? They were all mary sues/gary stus. I took that to be the average, not wanting to take any more risks – if I saw many more sue fics, I think I may need eye surgery. By the way, in advance, I know cats can't read. It just goes with the story. Mmm'kay?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Warriors.**

**Claimer: I do, unfortunately, own Sweetkit and A Sweet Hero. D: Eventually, i'm going to put it up for sale. Any early buyers?**

It all started when the dawn patrol came back, Lionblaze holding a strange thing in his jaws. It was what Twolegs would call a 'book', but of course ThunderClan didn't know that.

Quite quickly, everybody knew of the strange phenomenon. Every cat came to look at it, each wandering what it is, and senior warriors shying away from its Twoleg scent. Bad memories, bad memories.

They learnt what it was only when Millie came out. Her eyes narrowed when she saw the strange object, and she sniffed at it carefully.

"I have seen something like this before," she mewed. "When I was a kittypet. The Twolegs called it a… um.. ah, a book."

"A book?" repeated Berrynose. He sniffed. "What a daft name."

"That's not the point, Berrynose. What is it?" Lionblaze said, impatiently.

"A book, obviously."

"Very funny."

Poppyfrost sniffed at it. "I think it says something up the top. There are lots of symbols. Strange… It's almost like I know what it's saying."

They all looked at it. Sure enough, they could all read it. "A Sweet Hero," Lionblaze read.

"You know, you didn't really need to read that," Dustpelt pointed out. "We could all see it."

Only Jaypaw said something to that, but he was only mumbling. Lionblaze caught him mumbling, "Forget about the blind ones…"

"Shall we see if it says anything else?" Icepaw asked.

"Why not?" said Graystripe, carefully opening it. The next page had more of the symbols.

Lionblaze began to read from it. "Once there was a young kit named Sweetkit. She was an only kit, and her mother, Poppyfrost – " all eyes flashed to Poppyfrost " – didn't care for her."

"What?" Poppyfrost burst out. "Of course I'd care for my kit!"

"We know that, Poppyfrost. Whoever's doing this, obviously doesn't, though," Cinderheart comforted her sister.

"Her only friend was Blossomkit, but she was about to move to the apprentice den, so Sweetkit wouldn't see her any more! Sweetkit was so, so, so – " Lionblaze looked up. "The rest of this is just 'sos'." He carefully flipped the page, and read the last words of the sentence. "So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so sad.

"She was wondering around camp one day, when she heard Jayfeather and Leafpool taking in the medicine den."

"But I'm not a medicine cat anymore!" Leafpool mewed, confused.

"Strange cat, whoever wrote this," Sandstorm mused.

" 'StarClan sent me a prophecy, Jayfeather,' Leafpool mewed urgently.

'What was it?' Jayfeather asked.

'The sweet will save this Clan,' Leafpool mewed ominously."

"Oh I wonder who that could be," Dustpelt said sarcastically.

"Yes, I wonder…" Spiderleg murmured, sincerely. Everyone stared at him. He looked embarrassed and looked at the ground.

"_Teh gasp!!1 _thought Sweetkit. _Who could the sweet be? I mean, it couldn't be me! I'm just a poor, stupid kit…_

w00t! i bt u luvd teh cliffie, peeps! And no flamez! U flamaz sck!"

"Flamers...?" Graystripe inquired. "What in the name of StarClan are they?"

Everybody shrugged. They were starting to think that Twoleg had written this. _Whoever wrote this is really weird…_

**A/n: This isn't an insult to OC writers. Your stories could be good. Who knows, one of the fics I read, the sue was just a kit, so may end up turning into a good character. Who knows? But still. There's gotta be a story somewhere in these archives doing something like this.**


End file.
